Missing Something??

Do you ever have those moments where you are so wrapped up in what is going on or what you have to get done, that you miss out. You miss the important things in life.

For example:
Tonight I was running around doing laundry, cooking, trying to get some paper work in order for school, e-mailing some instructors and the whole time I was doing all of this my mind was wandering planning out my tomorrow. And then all of a sudden I was like crap I have to get some stuff to make my portion of the work pot luck tomorrow. I ran out of the house to my car and when I sat down in my car ready to focus on driving to the grocery store, I was like WOW it is raining!! At that moment I stopped and I wanted to kick myself in the butt...I was too busy worrying, too busy panicing, too busy busying myself..yes with things that need to get done but I was so wrapped up in them I was missing something..something that I love! I was so busy I didnt even realize it was raining, I didnt even process that it was raining while I was running to my car, my mind was too focused at that point on something that doesnt even matter. I love the rain, I love the smell of it, I love the sound of it (I might not have the same love for it if it were to rain everyday but i do love it).

It sucks when you make yourself so busy with stuff that you miss out on the things that matter in life: The beauty, the things that are happening, the people that matter..Just saying!

Maybe it is time to slow down.

Is life supposed to be comfortable??

I have absolutely no answer for that question! Well, truthfully I do and my answer would be: wouldn't that be nice! A comfortable life, a life of no hurting, a life of no disappointment, a life of no upheaval, a life of no surprises, a life of maybe few joyous moments or triumph or victory as you conquer the hurt or disappointment..

But really life(or the real life of loving people and caring for those around you) is not comfortable no matter how hard you try to make it..and if your life is comfortable maybe I want to know your secret! or maybe you are doing something wrong??? Just a thought...or maybe just my thought based on the definition of a comfortable life through my eyes...

The Answer to Life's biggest question...

What is the purpose to life??????



hahaha..I don't have the answer to that! i don't really think anyone really does, or maybe I should say if you sat at a table with ten people and you said to them you have to answer this question, you can not say there is no answer each person would have a different answer. Some would maybe say there is no purpose, some may say it is to live each day as it is your last, some might say it is to party your ass off, some might say it is to serve God, others might say it is to work live and have a family, others might say something else..I am sure you could fill in a few blanks of your own.

Do I have an answer to this question for myself..yes! I would say that as I have grown, changed, moved to a different place in life..this answer has more then changed a few times but it often comes right back to this: THE PURPOSE OF LIFE IS TO LOVE! Love who you are, love the life you have been given, love the moment, love each day, love the opportunities, love each person(I would have to say this one I struggle with at times..some people are just harder to love then others).
I live by this rule and really for me I think it is the only one that I have to live by and it covers a lot..IF I DO NOT LOVE THEN I AM NOTHING!

Hit the Pause Button

Press Pause..don't press fast forward or rewind, just press pause.

Now take a look at what you see!!! Remember we didn't press fast forward so we are not looking at what is to come, and we didn't press rewind so we are not looking at what has been...you pressed pause, look at right now!!

Look at the picture of right now!!! Look at how much you have, don't think about what you don't have! Think about what you have! Because the reality is you have so much!!!

When I press pause and actually think about it..I realize I have so very, very much!! Much more then I could actually dream of having...I can always dream of having more we all can but when we focus on that more we lose focus on what we have right now!!
And right now..I have an amazing family, the greatest friends, a job that I love, freedom, so many opportunities it is unbelievable...and so many other everyday things that I totally take for granted! Right now I have sooo much!!
I will always dream of more or better, somehow we are just wired like that...but in reality I am so rich, if you could see my bank account you would laugh at that statement and say you are so far from it..but money is not life and in life I am soo very rich!!!

Have you ever wondered HOW IMPORTANT you are and how much you effect those around you..and in turn effect those around them??

It is really a crazy thought..you by your actions, your words, your smile, your kindness, your frown, your knives they all effect the person they are directed at but in turn effect the people that, that person interacts with. So really if you think about it you could have contact with one person in your day, but be effecting 20....WOW that is big...Did you know that YOU, Your actions are really that important.

I have gotten to thinking about this a lot lately. As I have been reflecting on life, as we are approaching four months since my dad has passed.
Funny...this man who passed away, I really didn't like who he was, but he was my dad, I don't like anything that he did, and I have scars in my life from him, but again he was my dad. I exited him from my life nine years ago or so, and haven't actually had any contact with him other then on the phone and receiving birthday cards in seven years. Actually if we are to get technical I haven't had contact with him directly in two years. Any contact has been through a lawyer, a nurse or a social worker, or the man that has called my moms on behalf of my dad with information. Yet...this man, my father who I exited from my life has effected my life for life(he effected the years he was apart of my life, in turn effected the years he was not..and I am sure will have some effect on the years to come)..he has effected the lives of those who get close to me, he has effected the lives of every boyfriend I have ever had and will have. He has effected the way I see things, he has placed fears in me, which will effect those around me.......What Power He has had.....

Now that is a negative example but it is the first that comes to mind and it is the one that got me to thinking about how powerful you are...and what kind of power do you want to have on someone Else's life. This man has died and he is still effecting my life..and the scars that he left I am sure no matter how much I try in life I will never be able to make them completely disappear, and some people may be able to look past the scars that I have, others wont be able to and others still will be effected by getting a closer look at them. The scars he has left on me will never just effect me even if I try hard to only let them effect me..in reality he has effected each person that comes into contact with me.

So again I ask you what kind of effect do you want to have on those around you....you have the power to make or break someones day, you also have the power to wound someone or help them to see how wonderful they really are.....Just remember your power your actions, your smile, your frown, your yelling, your laughing, your anger, your kindness it doesn't just effect you. It doesn't just effect the person it is being directed at, and it may not just only effect today.

This..

I started this blogging thing a while a go..and those of you who check back to see what I have been doing, have probably noticed that all my old posts have disappeared. Those posts have been my past and are things I have seen and lived and ideas I have had..but I deleted them. And those of you who check here I am sorry I have definitely neglected this blog for a long time.
I deleted the posts and went to hand writting in a journal..for many reasons in the journal I never had to filter the thoughts that were streaming from my head or worry about who might read them, or be offended by them..my journal has become a good release, and even though I am picking this blog back up I will continue to journal as this will be different.
This time as I pick up this MY LIFE blog..it will hopefully not look like it once did. It wont be a journal of MY LIFE I can almost promise you that..but it will be a collection of random thoughts or thinking moments, or things that I have maybe read and want to share, or things that have made me laugh, or cry, or ache..more or less just things that have made me think or I have been thinking about a lot lately. The thoughts will obviously come from things I am living..so there will be pieces of my life written on this page.